Love Revolution vs love Revitalization -THE CHANGE BEGINS WITH YOU

I am currently reading a book called the love revolution, unlike the title ,it has very little to do with relationships witch was my initial impression, but has more to do with how poverty stricken the world is and in order to change all the worlds current alignments, love and revolution are the key fundamentals to the change ...or a love revolution.

The concept of a love revolution however.. got my mind playing around with the idea of a revolution in general, can one have a revolution in your love life? or current relationship? or even a revolution of the self... ?

This sudden fascination with the concept sent me into  a researching frenzy on what a revolution means?! and what it entails… hours and weeks even months of research later and being more clued in ...I thought..

Wouldn’t it be brilliant , if people applied the theory of a revolution to themselves? or even their relationships?

Endless articles later I realized  that there are tons of information on revitalizing love, and oneself but I wasn't interested in the idea of going on a retreat with your loved one , or a dinner date or taking yourself for a spa date, or reading a self-help book or even attending a seminar.... this is not so much revolutionizing!

So what's a Revolution?

A revolution is a sudden.  Complete . Profound change in the way people live or work, it is a significant change that usually occurs suddenly, with the aim of changing the way things were before. sudden... complete.. profound.

A Revolution focuses on personal behaviour. It is not just a call to action; it is a call to being…. being the person who goes out of their way to encourage CHANGE, ignite change, or inspire change.

Change for a situation that is  out of hope;  being the one  in your current situation who is willing to do something for nothing more than bettering ,or turning a situation around.

Now I ask again, would that not be brilliant for the self or for a relationship? ... the idea to decide today to rally all the troops inside you and venture out on a LOVE REVOLUTION?

Revolutions require martyrs, or hero’s.. people who will go to the ends of earth for love to reign, for change , for bettering a current situation....this means choosing to be the one person in your life or love life to spark new hope, ignite old passion and inspire a mutually beneficial way forward.

If you are sitting today and you have realized that its time to fight against things that have become so wrong in your life or relationship, that they should no longer be!

Things that were once small ,that have now  become SO big, but are none the less  STILL wrong OR at least  must be made small again then ….

 A revolution, or complete turnaround, a LOVE revolution may be  EXACTLY  what you need, this may be what is needed  if you want  to see some of the tragic injustices in your relationship or heart or life -  go away

We all know that relationships can be a gift and a curse, in that one moment , the relationship world is your oyster, filled with countless romantic possibilities,  and then suddenly within the blink of an eye ,you and your significant other are floating in a desert like abyss, with not  an oasis in sight for your relationship to drink from, things are dull, uncomfortable, wrapped in anger and resentment , coupled with constant knit picking and giant pretty EXIT signs around every corner of your thoughts.

We are all aware that our lives could have been going on a great path, we are working on ourselves, we are choosing to be better, we are doing the work to piece the puzzles back together and then suddenly we get comfortable, and before we know it we are busy with things or people or mind-sets that don't serve our growth or happiness.  

That being said..This post isn’t just a call to action; it’s a call to being . . . choosing today to being the person in your current situation to become the agent of change.

Choosing to help a friend instead of walk away, to forgive a loved one instead of harbouring resentment, choosing to apologize even if you did no harm, choosing to own the pain that you may  have helped  to create.

 Most importantly though choosing to  be the person who chooses to practice uncompromising acts of kindness! all in plight of revolutionizing the status quo.

I repeat myself choosing to practice UNCOMPROMISNG ACTS OF KINDNESS.

 

So How do I start practicing a love revolution?

Well according to research, a revolution requires a few fundamental things:

1.Know your goal – Decide today that you want change, that you want a healthy relationship or  a fulfilling life. Think long and think hard, as this is a decision of the heart, and if a love revolution  is what you have decided on TODAY,  then be HELL BENT on having a good attitude in making it work- hear me when I say HELL BENT – as in  come hell or high water- you being the  hell and the high water!
 
2.Work towards the change – A love revolution must be dedicated to making things better.
I have come to realize that talking is not expensive, nor does it require much effort, but real love is costly.

o   It will cost you time,

o    it will cost you money,

o   it will cost you your EGO,

o    It will mean having to forgive,
      -yourself for doing things that do not serve your growth.
      -forgive your partner for all their wrongs

 

Whatever you can do, is worth doing, no matter how small, a coffee, an errand, a note, a gift  a text, going for a walk, eating healthy, quitting bad habits .. ( and by that i also mean people ) or simply choosing not to be angry anymore, choosing to break the cycle- MAKING THINGS BETTER.
 
3.Respect - Treat each other right ,treat yourself right  – do what is right no matter what forget that they should’ve done this ....and should’ve done that... and don’t do enough of this.....and don’t do enough of that..... treat each other right because of RESPECT- full stop.

 

4.Focus on the Revolution\cause - Forget about yourself for a minute, ( if in a relationship) you’re always going to be there for yourself…a  revolutions need a hero and a hero is someone who chooses to make a place better for all.

The change begins with you. Choose the Love Revolution.

StilettoRambler.

Things aren’t the way  it use to be in the beginning of  our relationship.

 

I am always struck by how the simplest realizations in life or comments from strangers can be the most profound.

Someone says something so simple to you, and suddenly you find yourself nodding profusely as if to acknowledge the light bulb that just blew in your head, never mind just having switched on.

Today I want to delve into “things not being the same way they used to be in the beginning of a relationship.

It’s absolutely frightening to think about the incessant need and endless fights that couples and friends have because things are not currently or remotely the same way they used to be.

How many people do you know whom have stayed in relationships for years based on things from the first few days, weeks, months, or the first year of them knowing eachother?

I have witnessed some of the deepest and strongest bonds between people, as well as some of the weakest relationships weather countless amounts of fights and back lashing at each other.

I have seen women and men seeping in DAYS\MONTHS of disappointments , scarier even for me is when i see people allowing their boundaries to be broken and at the extreme end  swallow mild to moderate forms of abuse because of “ how great the honey moon phase \beginning of the relationship used to be ”  and how desperately they want to get back there.

I've seen couples finding a hundred different creative ways to recapture those feelings of bliss that came with the begininggof their relationships ..you know the slew of dates nights, role play, time apart, hotel rooms , expensive getaways ..

It often makes me wonder why?......... what are the true intentions of this mission to recapture the honey moon phase..

 Are we searching for that newness because ,we miss the person that we were at that time? 

Are we still buying into Hollywood fairy tales of happy endings?

Or is the reality of the current state of your relationship so rotten and disappointing that it’s easier to grasp onto the past instead of dealing with the present?

The ugly truth for me is a simple one. We cannot base our decisions to stay, fight or salvage a sinking ship based on how great  the beginning of it USE TO BE, its delusional and its lazy and selfish, yes selfish , why?  Because, it serves your growth as person no purpose. It serves your relationship no purpose and it makes the other party a prisoner of something that no longer exists and is impossible to recapture.

If you give two cents about your happiness and current relationship standing then do us all a favour and let go!

·         Let go of the boy he used to be.

·         Let go of the girl you used to be.

·         Let go of the friend that she was, and see the one she is now.

·         Let go of the things you used to do, and focus on what you do now, but mostly let go of the expectations that you mentally noted down during that honey moon phase of how things should be ..

 

Understand that you have changed, understand the people you were three months ago are gone, but recognise that that couple 3 months earlier,   have left you a foundation to further build on.

 Focus on the newness of today, in both of you and in your relationship; celebrate who you are now, for crying out loud we can’t spend an entire relationship at the beginning so that we don’t have to deal with reality that things are far less than perfect.

Your thoughts ?

StilettoRambler