The Mirrors we date……The Mirrors we date…..
The book that changed my life was a couple of years ago is titled “Life lessons” by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.
In this book I came across the notion of the different life lessons , common to all mankind that we need to learn in order, to become well rounded individuals, these lessons came from people on their death beds basically “what our mortality can teach us about life”
The lessons are: Love, Happiness, forgiveness, grief, play, anger and being authentic,
Now in order to fully indulge and give these lessons a serious go- I embarked on a journey …being that I would read one lesson i.e (love) and spend the next month or so consciously trying to live this lesson- as in completely mindfully practice the lessons…8 lessons 8 months.
Exert from the book : "The ultimate lesson all of us had to learn is unconditonal love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well"
Let me just tell you, unconditional love is not easy, to love without condition is still something I am busy practicing …anyway
Needless to say, it takes thirty days to instill a new habit, so by the time I would get to the next lesson, the other one had slowly become a part of me…. and so I began to grow and with that said, this brings me to today’s post: The Mirrors that we date…..
Becoming conscious of lessons in life, and how they get taught ……….it got me thinking….can people be lessons to?
and just like that ,my strongest belief was created , that being that,
People are journeys to lessons we need to learn,
People are journeys to lessons we need to learn
Hear me again; People (just like experiences_) …. Are journeys to lessons we need to learn…..
Whether it be to learn to trust, speak up for ourselves, let go..Face fears, learn tolerance, patience, and respect ….etc
We tend to attract or navigate towards souls that reflect things, we believe about ourselves. about love and about relationships….and sadly if we have negative beliefs about ourselves, love and relationships, we will then tend to navigate ourselves towards people that re-affirm these believes.
Firstly – I am hoping that since the first post we are all practicing more authenticity ….owning your good, bad and uglies….
Really taking out the time to understand THE PERSON WHO STARES BACK AT US IN THE MIRROR EVERY DAY…..truly understanding …our needs and why they are our needs, tackling our daddy issues, owning our mommy issues, owning our pasts…admitting how it has shaped us , looking at our core, identifying the holes in the self, owning our desires but more importantly
Understanding them so that we can identify the ones that aren’t in line with where we want to be and fix them accordingly….
Why?
Well if you don’t you will continually attract the lesson (person) that reflects your negative believes about yourself, you will continually attract-the life\relationship lesson you haven’t tackled….or addressed just like a diving test, if you don’t pass it, you will continue to take it over and over.
If you have ever sat with me in a conversation, you will note if someone in the room makes an observation about me, that may be a little crass, I always say thank you- that is if offcourse if its true .
E.g” wow but your stubborn , opinionated, bitchy, standoffish and or rude…. I always respond with a cool “thank you” cause authentically I am all that, and I have no problem owning it- you should own all your bits too!
The ugly truth is, if you keep finding yourself in a different relationship with the same ol problems….you’re ignoring the lesson,. Full top
i.e “if he cheated on you, and you never realllly forgave him before you moved on,
you will land up cheating on your new partner ,due to regressed anger ,beat yourself up for becoming the monster you had walked away from and land up begging for forgiveness, that you never even truly gave before…thus ultimately understanding the power and need for forgiveness and hopefully silently forgiving..The first perpetrator...
Take a deeper look at your bed mirror, if what is looking back at you is anger, control and disrespect…there is a lesson there about yourself you are refusing to tackle…but willing to date..
Address your core, do the work… in the long term its way more beneficial and likely to lead to a mutually fulfilling relationship, then continually attracting unfulfilling relationships…due to ignorance of lessons…
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